{Raising Boys Day 24} Who Am I to Raise a Man?

pixabay raising boys large (image courtesy pixabay)

Dear son,

Wow. You are a son.

What gives me as a woman the right to raise you, a boy?

You were my second-born.

When your sister came along, I could instantly relate to all the uniqueness of her being female.

I would be able to comfort her when those hot tears of confusion wet her face.

I would be able to talk her down from hormone-induced drama. (OK, maybe after she cooled off.)

Everything about you was different from the beginning.

You were bigger. Your bones were larger. Your muscles were stronger.

I knew that it wouldn’t be long before you surpassed your older sister in size and in strength.

Even now at four years old, it is clear to me that you will be much bigger than me when you are older.

What gives me the right to raise this boy who will tower over me some day?

There are so many things in this life you will face that I will never face as a woman.

You come to me with tears in those big brown eyes and bury your head in my lap when you’re hurting.

You can be fuming mad at me one minute and showering me with hugs the next.

You don’t mind getting your hands dirty. You don’t mind picking up live bugs off the ground with your bare hands.

I don’t think I’ve once heard you utter the word “Ewww”.

What gives me the right to raise this little man?

Your father told me that when you were born I would notice the difference between you and your sister physically. He told me you would be sturdy and strong.

He was right. Your sister was so soft. Tender and delicate.

So what I am here for?

I am the representation of the part of you that is missing. I am not the part to be sure.

However, I am your first example of her.

God is complete. He made Adam in His image.

However, He held something back. And lovingly allowed Adam to experience the pain of loneliness and the longing for companionship.

Adam could only achieve wholeness by combining with Eve. Not the kind of wholeness that can’t live without its other half.

The kind of wholeness that can only fulfill its purpose when the two are made one.

I’m here to teach you how to walk in that wholeness.

I will teach you how to relate to me.

And I will model for you the role a woman plays in this divine dance of hearts.

[bctt tweet=”A mother is a boys first example of what to look for in his future wife. #boymom @julievascon “]

Your sister was very attached to your father before you came along.

But I knew things would be different with you. I told him, “The next one’s mine.” ☺

I knew that something in your heart would be awakened with an awareness that mommy is a symbol of something wonderful yet to come.

Just as your sister bonded with her father in a loving male-female connection, so you and I would bond that way.

What right do I have to teach you anything about being a man?

I will allow you to be the male that God made you to be. I won’t try to change you into something you’re not.

I won’t try to squelch the warrior that lives inside of you. I will strive to place appropriate boundaries around you so you may grow into a man that treats people with respect.

I will teach you about the Lord and specifically of your namesake, King David, and how his heart was always after the Lord even in the wake of terrible choices.

Your heart longs to be free.

I understand that. More than you know.


  • I ask God to help me give you the freedom you need along with the boundaries you need.
  • I ask God to help me cultivate a relationship with you that is built on respect.
  • I ask God to help me be the kind of mom that you will call on the phone long after you have left home.
  • I ask God to help me be the mother-in-law your wife would want me to be.
  • I ask God to help me encourage you even as you make mistakes.
  • I ask God to temper my personality so that my natural flaws will not hinder who He has called you to be.


  • I thank God for this marvelous privilege He has given me of being your mom.
  • I thank God for allowing me the opportunity to be your first glimpse of the female side of the most wonderful combination in all of history.
  • I thank God for all the snuggles and cuddles, for however long they last.
  • I thank God for the privilege of taking part in seeing this boy grow into a man.
David flip








Genesis 2:22-24

22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23 The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman, ‘ for she was taken out of man.” 24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.










About the author:

Julie Vasconcelos blogs at www.momonthefly.com

She is a wife and mom to a blended, multi-cultural family raising kids from toddlers to teenagers. She is also a former missionary to Brazil. She is currently working on her 2nd fiction book. You can check out her Facebook page as well.


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