He is curled up in my lap. Skinny lanky legs that are as long as mine, but he is curled up in my lap.
All eleven years of him.
It is family movie night, and I hold back tears, knowing this might be the last time I hold him like this. He is almost as big as I am. My heart yearns to keep him this little, but something in my heart knows that it is time.
Time to let him become a man.
As mama’s it is hard to think of our little boys as young men. I still see him with dirt playing outside with Tonka trucks- and he is inside dreaming of what his real truck will look like one day.
How do we let our little boys become a man? How do we let them go?
First, we need to reconcile in our hearts that this is what God gave them to us for. They were given to us as a reward from Him, to raise for Him, and then to be shot into the world as arrows, blazing brightly about His business. I know, easier said than done.
“Sons are a heritage from the Lord,
children a reward from Him.
Like arrows in the hands of a warrior
are son’s born in one’s youth.
We need to give them opportunities to be little men. We need to teach them responsibility. We need to remember we are preparing them for the future. As much as I always want him to be a Mama’s boy, I need him to be a man of integrity.
So, I will lay aside my Mama heart just a little, and I will train him. I will train him in chores (his future wife, oh she will thank me). I will make him responsible for things. I will teach and train that a job must be finished to completion. That it is okay to get your hands dirty and work hard and long. We need to be sure they know how to cook a meal, wash a load of laundry and change a tire. They need to be able to be men.
[bctt tweet=”Dear #boymom, let your little boy grow up to be a man. Train him well. @WorshipfulLivin”]
We need to give them time to be with men. It is time for them to hang with Dad (or other Godly male role models). It is time they learn how to shake hands and make eye contact and deal with situations.
They need to be around men who study the Word and are focused on prayers- because this is the kind of spiritual leader we want them to be in their homes.
We need them see men serving in the church –and we need them to serve beside them.
We need to let these men teach them to respect women. To have boundaries. To have accountability.
Yes Mama. We need to let them grow up.
No, it isn’t easy on our heart. It might even break a little.
However, it is nothing compared to the heartbreak there will be if we don’t.
Satan is out to attack real men in our society. He doesn’t want them to be spiritual leaders. He wants them to have failed marriages, and to sit silently – or not at all- in the church. He wants to make them weak and passive, and allow women to rule over them. He wants that. When that happens, he gets what he wants.
So don’t let Satan get the glory in your son. Raise him to be a man. Let God get the Glory – and allow your son to do what he was born to do.
Train up a child in the way He should go,
and when he should go, and when he is old –
he will not depart from it.
Mandy is passionate about two things: The Word of God and the Souls of Men (and Ladies!). She is a married to her best friend, and gets the privilege to love on their three blessings (who lost their biological momma leaving her husband widowed). She loves that the Lord has let her life be an example of delighting in Him and watching Him mold her life to make her desires match His. She spent 9 years in an early childhood classroom, and 4 years in an “in house” seminary program at her home church. She loves to bring God glory through her roles as Christ-follower, Wife and Mother (in that order!) She enjoys women’s ministry, cooking, crafting, and traveling the world. Mandy is also passionate about Adoption and helping women with Infertility- as both are areas God has trusted her with. Her greatest desires are to have her marriage bring God ultimate glory, see her children walk in truth, to lead others to the feet of Jesus, and to lead women into deeper and intimate relationship with their Savior through study of the Word of God. You can find Mandy writing at Worshipful Living blog and socializing on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter and Periscope.
Mandy, This was so so so good! I’m raising two boys and as they get older and we interact with other boys, I see so many not growing into honorable young men. I pray every day God equips my husband and I to raise young men that will represent Jesus well!
Blessings and smiles,
Letting our boys become men means giving them responsibilities, letting them fail and teaching them to get up, when to fight the good fights and when to walk away. Our culture limits our young men’s ability to be independent because it is difficult to get jobs before they’re 18. They’re discouraged from defending themselves or others in schools – and in an “everyone wins” culture – they don’t truly experience failure. It is a difficult time for these boys to men of ours.
Thanks for the encouraging words. We have four boys and are working, by God’s grace, to raise them to be real men for God.
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